Yes

I read an article recently that encourages parents to say "yes" more. It's really a reverse psychology situation, where you basically twist "no" into "yes" while talking to your kids. You need to say "yes" but after saying yes, explain why said thing is harmful or non-inviting to them. It makes them not want what they're asking for anymore, but THEY are deciding they don't want it anymore rather than you deciding for them. Does that make sense? They say it makes them more confident and happier and more able to make good choices as they get older. I decided to try it. So here are two things I said "yes" but "no" to this week, and it actually worked!

-Lunchables: those horrible, sodium filled, processed, packaged lunches that you find near the hot dogs in the grocery store. I told them they could eat them, but it may stunt their growth and they will be tired for the rest of the day after they eat it and won't be as energetic as they normally are. Did I fabricate a bit? Yes. But it worked. They decided they didn't want them on their own. All I did was provide them with a few stretched truths. There was no arguing or whining. It was great.

-Watching E.T.: The bottom line is they're too young. Apparently, some kids at school have been allowed to watch it and they're very anxious to join in on the discussions of the movie. After being puzzled as to why some parents of 4 and 5 year olds think they're child was going to be able to handle and process a movie in which an alien comes to visit a boy and his family and gets taken away by eager scientists and is nearly killed after said family (and the rest of the world) falls in love with him and ultimately goes away where the boy will never see him again, I said "yes, you can watch it but..." . I calmly explained that I, myself, was 8 years old when I saw the movie and I was very sad afterward for a long time. I told them that it was an incredible movie, but maybe one that they would not understand yet and that we should save it for when they're older because it will mean more to them and that I didn't want them to be sad from watching a movie. It worked. They decided they'd rather not watch it. I'd also like to add that one of the parents at school brought in their child late one day, and when asked why they were late the mom said, "oh, she watched E.T. over the weekend and she was up having nightmares so she slept late." I rest my case.

So I'm finding that the article is correct. I'm pleasantly surprised and I will continue logging my progress and (hopefully) success on this subject. I will admit it takes a lot more creativity on my part than simply saying "no", but the results are much better.